The concepts around language and communication have always fascinated me. Communication is not merely the transference of sounds through the air or markings on paper. There is so much more to communication than just the sounds or markings. Looking at everything that goes into even a simple, short exchange reveals that communication is an incredibly complex and layered process, with many opportunities for missteps. It amazes me that we get it right as often as we do, but when it goes wrong…
I have to remind myself often that the way I like to communicate and be communicated with frequently differs significantly from the people I work with, and the same is true for each of them. Since I deal with very technical minded people, I have to remember they tend to like precise directions, with everything laid out in detail. Senior management wants only a quick overview, and will ask for details when they need them. Some people speak primarily in factual language, or while I tend to use metaphors and similes as examples.
I frequently have to mediate conflicts that arise from some people’s inability to modify their communication style based on the conscious and unconscious feedback they get from their audience. This is a vital skill, that can be learned and improved with practice, but a lot of people don’t recognize this. They miss signs that their audience is not comfortable with the message: furrowed brows, touching their face or neck folding their arms. I see these as signs my message is not coming across correctly (or at all.) Maybe they don’t understand me, maybe they don’t agree with me, but when I see these signs, I know to change my communication.
